Aryan Skynet

Once Aryan Skynet Goes Live It Doesn't Matter Who Pulled The Switch

A Total Hack of Agency


Those in search of Christmas viewing off the beaten path this year might want to look up Agency, a 1980 Canadian thriller about media weaponization that a reader recently brought to my attention. Written for the screen by the nobody Noel Hynd and adapted from a novel by the equally obscure Paul Gottlieb, Agency was directed by Hungarian expatriate George Kaczender, who would spend most of the eighties making TV movies and directing episodes of forgotten shows like Night Heat and Freddy’s Nightmares. As its undistinguished pedigree would tend to predict, Agency is a fairly cheesy and artistically unremarkable piece of filmmaking – at least at the first glance – but does reward the close attention of those willing to sit through it.

Agency Rubinek

Saul Rubinek as Sam Goldstein in Agency (1980)

Uncharismatically masculine Lee Majors stars as Philip Morgan, a copywriter for a major advertising agency who learns that mysterious executive Ted Quinn (Robert Mitchum) may be up to something sinister. The real hero of the movie, however, is Morgan’s hyper-Jewish paranoiac nerd buddy Sam Goldstein (Saul Rubinek, who in 1978 had appeared as a “young, starry-eyed Trotsky-idealist” in a TV movie called Love on the Nose), who just knows that Washington insider Quinn is utilizing the agency to further the (no doubt crypto-fascist) aims of some vast conspiracy. The apprehensions of frightened Jews must always be taken seriously – a truism Morgan learns the hard way – and Goldstein of course turns out to be correct about Quinn, who, it is eventually revealed, is embedding subliminal political messages into seemingly innocuous TV commercials for chocolate.

Jew-wise viewers will get a kick out of the over-the-top characterization of Goldstein, who, while obviously intended to provoke viewer sympathy, comes across nearly as pungently as some pushy, leering, and simpering anti-Semitic caricature. Rubinek’s features and curly hair and the character’s surname are already ultra-Jewish, but the movie, just to drive home extra hard the fact that the melancholic jokester is one of the Chosen, even includes a scene in which he slaps a yarmulke onto his head outside a church where a funeral is in progress. Genetically incapable of reverence in the presence of Christians, Goldstein disrupts the service when he enters the church and stumbles, creating a commotion. (Agency takes another swat at Christianity later in the movie when Morgan’s love interest, played by Valerie Perrine, outsmarts the henchmen sent to abduct her by feigning labor pains in a crowd of Christmas shoppers as “Hark! The Herald Angels Sing” can be heard in the background – a blatant mockery of the Virgin birth.) Goldstein, who even refers to himself as a “snake in the grass”, is also dishonest, telling Morgan that mealybugs have infested a plant in his office – only to later admit, “I lied to you; I’m just trying to get your attention.”

Telling little details like this – a Jew kidding about vermin infestation or joking about trapping his goy boss in a burning building or even drinking his blood – entertain on a meta level in a movie which is itself telling fibs to get the viewer’s attention. Agency dates from the period of the oil embargo, “Billygate”, the “Abscam” scandal, and movies like 1976’s Network and 1986’s Power, when Hollywood and the Jewish establishment had America getting the jitters over the rather unlikely prospect of inscrutable Arabs taking control of U.S. politics, business, and the media – getting the public squeamish over phantom mealybugs, in other words. It is here that Agency shows an unexpected level of cleverness, itself employing the sort of subliminal messaging about which it pretends to be concerned.

Agency NonWASP

Nothing sabotages the non-WASP political opposition quite like a cartoon goblin grimace superimposed on his face in a TV commercial.

Malevolent advertising executive Quinn, whose shady dealings may have something to do with the company Banner Oil, is seeking to unseat a member of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee; and, although the specifics of the conspiracy’s long-term plan are never revealed, subtle semiotic cues suggest that Middle-Easterners may be mixed up in it somehow. In one scene, a figure dressed in what appears to be Arabian or North African garb can be briefly glimpsed strolling through the corridor outside Quinn’s office. In another scene, set in a bar, a picture of a camel just happens to be hanging on a wall behind Quinn – and, in the momentous confrontation when Quinn admits to his brainwashing scheme, a painting of pyramids can be seen to adorn his office – all of the subliminal clues adding up to some insidious Middle East imbroglio, probably (I’m just going out on a limb here) imperiling Israel.

Is Agency a good movie? No, not if we’re being honest; but it is a fun nostalgia trip and does constitute a revealing document of its time in our political history, so thanks for the recommendation, Les.

Rainer Chlodwig von K.

Rainer is the author of Protocols of the Elders of Zanuck: Psychological Warfare and Filth at the Movies – the DEFINITIVE Alt-Right statement on Hollywood!


About icareviews

Author, Protocols of the Elders of Zanuck: Psychological Warfare and Filth at the Movies

10 comments on “A Total Hack of Agency

  1. icareviews
    December 21, 2018

    Reblogged this on icareviews.


  2. Body by Bud
    December 22, 2018

    Was the real hero of China Syndrome Michael Douglas, the “hippy” cameraman? I can’t remember, but that movie fit in with all these movies you’re talking about: grim, gloomy, full of grey faced whiteys with grey suits and ultraserious expressions on their mugs because…everyone and everything is out to get us and destroy our world of cute little blond children eating cereal and saying cute things to their parents before the parents ruffle their hair and go out to slay dragons. But the only people who can really save us are…magical clowns.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Maureen Martin, Aryan Street
    December 23, 2018

    The movie can be seen for free one YouTube.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. bob saffron
    December 25, 2018

    Merry Christmas, Aryan Skynet!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. james
    December 25, 2018

    Merry Christmas.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. indravaruna
    December 28, 2018

    “Agency dates from the period of the oil embargo, “Billygate”, the “Abscam” scandal, and movies like 1976’s Network and 1986’s Power, when Hollywood and the Jewish establishment had America getting the jitters over the rather unlikely prospect of inscrutable Arabs taking control of U.S. politics, business, and the media”

    Funny, I read a reportage from Haaretz that Qatar found the fastet way of gaining influence in Washington, just bribe pro-israel Jewish “right-wing” advocates. Everyone knows which side the bread is buttered.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Les
    December 31, 2018

    Thanks for taking the time to review Agency. I am happy to provide a recommendation which may interest you. Yes, the character of Goldstein is so in your face with his Jewishness that you cannot escape it. The actor Saul Rubinek is a Jew in real life so he obviously had no problems playing such a role. That same year of 1980 he also appeared in Death Ship a horror film where an abandoned vessel once used by Nazis haunts the high seas something akin to the Flying Dutchman. It also starred George Kennedy and Richard Crenna –

    Liked by 1 person

    • icareviews
      December 31, 2018

      I’ve seen Death Ship. Rotten movie! I remember hoping it would be more like the superior Shock Waves, which I would recommend to zombie fans.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Pingback: A Total Hack of Agency | Hipster Racist

  9. weeedwacker
    January 30, 2019

    I really wish I knew how to make webms.
    I’d like to isolate that crazy commercial they made near the end of he film.
    I love goofy stuff like that!


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